back to the gods of chaos toying with me....
or maybe it's just me toying with myself....
but before i begin to complain about my latest batch of chaos, let me say this: I did a spread about the issue, and pulled the Tower (unwanted change or trial resulting in a valuable lesson or life experience) in the current situation, and in the outcome, i pulled the Sun (a new beginning, a chance at happiness and fullfilment.)
So here it is: I got sideways demoted at work, wich i honestly can't decide if i'm upset about. it was nothing i did, simply that employee X was offered assistant manager position 2 months ago and declined because persueing other avenues at that time. I was offered the same position, and accepted, but now employee X has come back asking for the same opportunity back. They gave employee X the assistant management role, because she could committ "indefinately" (as opposed to my 2008, which apparently isn't long enough...) and i get "team Leader" role of 1 store, instead of working with all 3 (though it seems that i will be anyway.)
Can't really blame management for going with employee X, because she's been with the store a long time, and would be able to take up the reins a bit faster than I. Really, the thorn that's sticking in my side is the simple fact that i won't get management credits to put on my resume. all this after finally deciding to decide on a decision. shit. i don't think i should be bruised by it, but the ol' pride is a little, let's say, sun burned. or itchy. no, let's stick with sun burned, it's just me that's itchy.
but in the big picture, my real goal is to spend the summer in the studio painting and making/selling art, and this may actually make that goal easier, as i will be working a mere 10 minute walk away from the studio, which i so sorely need to visit more often. so maybe i should stop complaining like a pop diva, and be thankful i'm not a starving orphan child barefoot in the snow.
It just pisses me off a bit, especially after i dismissed yet another offer for employment yesterday, one working with a "high end" art gallery for a lot more money (though, i figured out after jumping a tax bracket, the actual amount of $$$ i would take home was negligable, especially when i consider i'd have to buy a whole wardrobe of for-real grown up clothes.)
But if they change my schedule so that I have to work nights/evenings, i might kick up a bit of a fuss. I'm kinda pissed off, but not really. I think i want to be pissed off, but i'm not, and that's what's frustrating me. Shouldn't i care more! Care damn you! CARE!
eh....like i said before, i can show up with gum in my hair and it wont matter. And (i'm sure future mrs R and Mr. Brown will vouch for this) working for the framing gallery would have sucked ass-popscicles.
So there ya go. no matter how i try, there can't be smooth sailing. at least no one is in the hospital this time....speaking of which! I am a horrible person, who doesn't call her dad enough.
but before i begin to complain about my latest batch of chaos, let me say this: I did a spread about the issue, and pulled the Tower (unwanted change or trial resulting in a valuable lesson or life experience) in the current situation, and in the outcome, i pulled the Sun (a new beginning, a chance at happiness and fullfilment.)
So here it is: I got sideways demoted at work, wich i honestly can't decide if i'm upset about. it was nothing i did, simply that employee X was offered assistant manager position 2 months ago and declined because persueing other avenues at that time. I was offered the same position, and accepted, but now employee X has come back asking for the same opportunity back. They gave employee X the assistant management role, because she could committ "indefinately" (as opposed to my 2008, which apparently isn't long enough...) and i get "team Leader" role of 1 store, instead of working with all 3 (though it seems that i will be anyway.)
Can't really blame management for going with employee X, because she's been with the store a long time, and would be able to take up the reins a bit faster than I. Really, the thorn that's sticking in my side is the simple fact that i won't get management credits to put on my resume. all this after finally deciding to decide on a decision. shit. i don't think i should be bruised by it, but the ol' pride is a little, let's say, sun burned. or itchy. no, let's stick with sun burned, it's just me that's itchy.
but in the big picture, my real goal is to spend the summer in the studio painting and making/selling art, and this may actually make that goal easier, as i will be working a mere 10 minute walk away from the studio, which i so sorely need to visit more often. so maybe i should stop complaining like a pop diva, and be thankful i'm not a starving orphan child barefoot in the snow.
It just pisses me off a bit, especially after i dismissed yet another offer for employment yesterday, one working with a "high end" art gallery for a lot more money (though, i figured out after jumping a tax bracket, the actual amount of $$$ i would take home was negligable, especially when i consider i'd have to buy a whole wardrobe of for-real grown up clothes.)
But if they change my schedule so that I have to work nights/evenings, i might kick up a bit of a fuss. I'm kinda pissed off, but not really. I think i want to be pissed off, but i'm not, and that's what's frustrating me. Shouldn't i care more! Care damn you! CARE!
eh....like i said before, i can show up with gum in my hair and it wont matter. And (i'm sure future mrs R and Mr. Brown will vouch for this) working for the framing gallery would have sucked ass-popscicles.
So there ya go. no matter how i try, there can't be smooth sailing. at least no one is in the hospital this time....speaking of which! I am a horrible person, who doesn't call her dad enough.
posted by mercurysmile at 3:49 AM
2 Comments:
I would definately be pissed. But that's me. And ya, if you are really dedicated to working in the studio more and being an actual artist, then maybe this pans out in the end. I would still be a bit pissed though. Isn't that life in retail? I mean, is there really complete satisfaction or stability in a retail position? Or maybe that's life.
I totally support your desire to do more art, 'cause in the end I think we all want to, but don't put enough dedicated time aside (even on my Tuesday Art Days). They end up being about doing adult life stuff (errands) and there's only like two hours of actual art practice...and lately that's been sewing. I keep trying to believe that all our art time and efforts will start to multiply and then one day we'll wake up and be in the thick of it all. Like I know it's gonna require a lot of hard work and kissing ass, but in the end, when you look at your future, don't you see yourself making art. There isn't a "career" per-say, but you're an artist.
(I haven't had my coffee yet this morning, so none of this may make sense. It seems to work in my head, but you know how that goes).
Good luck in everything you do.
Oh well, maybe keep your eyes open for another opportunity. Megan
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