The 17 things I've come to realize today:

1. too many things worry me that are not my concern/fault/responsibility- and so I should really stop worrying about them all

2. I've come to realize that my boss actually isn't riding my ass all day- she just has absolutely NO social skills, and therefore barks and scowls when all she really needs to do is ask. Also- she rules through fear and emotional blackmail- and I will have none of that shite! I've come to far these last few years to let someone turn emotional screws on me. Eff that shit! Seriously her employees are honestly afraid of her. that is wrong. but i'm getting paid like stink, so I'll ride it out as long as i can- or until she fires me (she doesn't have the stones!)

C. It's okay to back out of commitments made to others in order to keep commitments made to myself- because at the end of the day, i need to look myself in the eye, and respect what I see.

7. upon reviewing my blog the last few months, i do believe i may be a touch manic. i mean, life is a roller coaster on it's own, but for some reason i feel the need to always be ducking and swirving, even on straight land.

11. I will be okay.

12. Cranberry slurpee you say? FANTASTIC! is what i say.

17. Even though this has been possably the craziest year of my life, the most emotionally strained, it is still the best year yet! I've met so many awesome new people and done crazy things that i never would have thought! I will not be made to feel guilty or shamefull for the small pleaseures i take in life- punk rock bingo included!

***

PS- No Nix, jaffles in a waffle iron do not work out so well. But don't fret! I'm on the hunt- there will be maple syrup filled jaffles yet, oh yes!

I'm never coming back!

Seriously. No, really, how much crap can happen in just one week. seven little days. As though I'm responsible for the world? I think not.

Hanging with B's and E's was cool though- I think I should definately drink more wine from slurpee cups! They are like the pied piper to me, they could suggest anything and I'd just follow along with sparkley eyes! Plan F, being moving to China to teach English, no longer seems that appealing after seing E's pics. Seems like just a lot of pollution and questionable hygiene. On to plan G then, I'll come up with something later today.

In the mean time, kids, let's play safe, look both ways before crossing the street, and stay off those train tracks!

Turn your face to the sun, and the shadows fall behind you...

that's like, some kind of proverb. or something. but anyway, i'll spare the horror of tha last week, and say this- you can always sink further down, but it's just as easy to pretend everything is fine, and wash the mud off like nothing happened. Huge thanks to Mr Brown for suggesting a trip to kaninaskis instead of driving off a bridge as oridinally planned! of course, as driver, I got to pick the trail we hiked, so naturally I chose the Widow Maker! fit my mood perfectly. but the wonderful smells and sounds of the babbling little stream were a tonic like no other!

Is this a sign of what i'm made of, or how I allow myself to be treated?

i'm so sick of eating shit for other people's fuck-ups. i'm sorry, if my efforts aren't good enough, then i'll just fuck off on the first flight outta here, and we'll all be the better for it.

it was Awesome!

Saw the new Pirates movie with Mr Brown. It was pretty good. and by pretty good, of course, i mean AWESOME! but the sad part is, now there are no more movies worth watching, ever. well, at least until some new Keanu flick comes out...heh.....errrr.....right.

and then this morning, i made the BEST mix cd ever. It's called "PS Your Face Is Smelly" and is available for the purchase price of $0.78 (CDN) please send a self addressed stamped envelope to:
Smelly CD Offer
6223 Bow Crescent NW
Calgary, AB, T3B 2C3
Canada

ps- it's well into the afternoon, and i am so totally still in my jammies! not getting dressed ever today! i may walk all the way to sev in my boxers and baseball shirt....actually, i live in Bowness, so that's like, normal.

Does this gum make my hair look too scenester?

Got hijacked into going to the Metric concert, and it ruled! even though it was at the Whiskey, and there were too many OMG! I'm SO EMO! type people, including one guy who's haircut was so EMO my shoes wanted to write angsty poetry and cry about it. Oh, and tons of those girls who don't think very much, but never seem to run out of things to say. Yes, I sat in judgement most of the night. The band rocked though, after only ten million opening acts. And then we went to Singapore sam's, which, in case you didn't know, turns into a disco club after hours. apparently. Good times on a monday. Too bad i'll be stupid tired at work tomorrow. Ah crap! Contract negotiations! ah well- good morning red bull!

Scones and Stones, Bitch!

Fuck Yeah!
Sicamous, BC






OMG! So much has happened! the wedding- awesome! I was the scandalously annebriated one at a conservative christian wedding! it felt so good to let loose and be crazy for once, and also be drunk on a paddle boat! Wa-hoo! Oh how I love to cause trouble!

And a week with big brother and FMR! So fantastic! although, even I must admit, if I ever see potato salad again, I'm going to go completely mad. (but at least I got to swipe the left-over birthday cake!) OH! and Punk Rock Bingo! of course I didn't win a dern tootin' thing, but at least FMR scored a t-shirt! Yeah Bitch! all I got was my choice of unnatractive guys with lame tattoos to go home with. I chose none. Thank you self-esteem!

Other than that, I got a cd jammed in my car stereo, and can't listen to anything but radio! HELP ME! Commercial Radio Is Ruining My Life! and also, work has become a shit show again! Why does this always happen? I'm beginning to think it's me. I'm thinking once I get hire/fire authority, I'm cleaning house and hiring some paper dolls, they'll do about as much work, but without the back talk. Sweet!

and also: Looking forward to sleep!

OMG! real live Cherry Coke in a can! a CAN! you have no idea the levels of joy. no idea!